550g

550g of a human being dwells in my body. 550g that is turning my life up-side-down. 

I went to a doctor today. We are both healthy - she is healthy and kicking, I'm healthy and running, walking and eating well so that when she's out some heatly habits are already in place. Ha! I wish it was that easy. 

I must admit that when I read things in books, things written by mother for mothers, by doctors for mothers, I get a feeling sometimes that these materials are there to scare me even more and give me a bigger headache. I am freaking out and I don't need more so I sometimes think that those publications exadurate the pains of parenthood but then... I think that they probably don't and what is presented is just an honest account of what will become my reality in four months.

Four months!!! And counting. I have a calendar on the wall in which like a prisoner I cross out the days. It seems that I won't be able to do all the things I wanted to do before she arrives like: learning fluent French and Hindi, going to India, learning yoga, becoming a marathon runner and doing my masters. And some more... The good thing is that come to think about it, I can do most of these things when She is here if I won't go crazy first.

But first things first... 

First I have to push out this litte body, which still seems to me more like si-fi than a fact of life. I still want to believe that a stork will drop Her at my doorstep and that will be it. Dream on.

As I'm already here, I'd like to thank all the people around the world who send me the words of courage. I think I've never been in more a need of feeling that the world around me is with me. I feel it and I'm very grateful. Thank you!!!