Yesterday it was a peak of my emotional meltdown. It seems like I let everything out verbally to Olivier and after that, like after Helena's delivery, all went quiet and peaceful.
I've made this decision before twice: after my Mom's death and later in Canada when all went wrong, that I would move on no matter what and will turn the negative into the positive. I'm making this decision now as well. With a lot of help from people around me and with my own determination, I managed to give a birth to a beautiful and healthy baby girl - a blessing. Now, after such a long time Olivier has joined me in the parenthood to this Little Miracle - another blessing. Another one is that we still can be friendly and talk to each other. And that it's not perfect and that we won't live together in a cute house with a white fence... well, I guess dreams sometimes don't come true. Or maybe I should expect that I will live in this dream one day but with someone else.
Helena has two parents: two big people who are crazy about her and who will do everything to make this girl happy and whole. I can't be happier for her. Another blessing.
Blessings and quietness with few breaks for Helena adding her cries. I'm going to enjoy this quietness and the precious moments I'm having with my little family here.
I'm officially opening closing this chapter and I'm rather eager to see how a new one is going to unfold.
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